So, I ask you, give me "Something."

It has become as custom of mine now, not only a custom, but a bad custom, to sleep to ignore life. And so when I am at my most nervous, most disappointed, most uncertain, I sometimes find no other solution than to sleep. When this drug-like sleep does take over me, it is not of great depth. On the contrary, I can see life happening as I sleep and I try to live it, in that other world where it seems more justifiable or possible. Lately, it all seems so tiring, that I feel it driving me to leave. I need to hope for "Something" else, for "Something" within the outside that can give me a certain breath of impulse. But it all seems like a custom and routine. And somehow, amongst it all, I seem to pass by unwanted and unrecorded. There is "Something" so large lacking in this fulfillment. And knowing, how much another did matter, and realizing that whatever I am to you, just didn't make it that far, did not make it on a list, is, sadly, still disappointing. 

So here I am, asking for "Something".